Valley Talk

Knocking on Death’s Door Already well known for teaching students how to keep things alive in its agricultural department, Pierce College in Woodland Hills is now turning its attention to the other end of the life cycle. President Bing Inocencio has proposed that the community college offer a degree in mortuary science. “There is certainly steady employment in this field,” Inocencio said. “People forget that mortuary work is an honorable, well-paid occupation.” The mortuary science degree is one of 16 new career programs that Inocencio proposed to better prepare students for entry into the workforce. Not surprisingly, the mortuary science degree is getting a strong reaction. “I’ve had businessmen ask me incredulously about this degree,” Inocencio said. “I explain that as a college president, it is my job to spot opportunities for my students. Mortuary science is simply one of them.” Giving a Dam Los Angeles has been having a heck of a time convincing the National Football League team owners to let our city have a professional football team. But maybe we’re going about it all wrong, just asking for one team. Why not push for two? “If we had two football stadiums in a region with 10 million people, I think we could have that,” said L.A. City Councilman Richard Alarcon, who represents a section of the Northeast Valley. “And the San Fernando Valley wasn’t even considered, even though I have 600 acres of land available to do that.” The land Alarcon envisions as a stadium site is at Hansen Dam. Never to Return Anyone awaiting Johnny Carson’s return to beautiful downtown Burbank should give up the ghost, says Carson’s long-time sidekick Ed McMahon. McMahon told the Business Journal that Johnny will never return to the small screen again, for any reason, period. Carson, who lives in Point Dume, spends his time travelling, relaxing and going to tennis matches. “You’re not going to see Johnny unless it’s on old TV (re-runs),” said McMahon. “Johnny did it and it’s over.” Not so for McMahon, who is co-starring with Tom Arnold in the WB network’s new show “Tom.” Cable Dancing There are cable TV channels devoted to just about every topic under the sun weather, cartoons, food, you name it. Now, Universal City-based freelance writer and dance enthusiast Rae Wilder is trying to establish the All Dance Cable Channel. One problem. “I don’t know how to make a cable channel,” concedes Wilder, who is seeking all manner of expertise and funds to realize her dream. The idea for the channel came at a recent dance seminar where she realized that most people scarcely see the world’s spectrum of dance. So far, she said, there have been pledges for elbow grease in the project, but no financial contributions. “All the dancers I meet are enthusiastic, but they can’t provide financing,” she said. Sweet Roles Next time Jerry Seinfeld wants to stuff his face with junk food, don’t be surprised if he reaches for a Twinkie. Interstate Brands Corp., the parent of Hostess Cakes, has retained Norm Marshall & Associates of Sun Valley to get its products featured in movies and television programs. Other Hostess products destined for Hollywood are Ding Dongs, Ho Ho’s and Suzy Q’s. Junk food may be the scourge of dietitians, but it has always been popular with TV and film producers, says Teri Ward, senior account director at Norm Marshall. “They are easily recognized and easily incorporated into a scene,” Ward said. “But we keep our eyes open. We don’t want people referring to the product negatively or to see anything irreverent done with it.” A Starr is Born Business leaders throughout the country have been bemoaning the lack of qualified job applicants for some time. And that’s certainly the case at World Modeling Talent Agency in Sherman Oaks. Located in a dingy, yellowing office on Van Nuys Boulevard between a yoga studio and an insurance agency, World Modeling supplies the local adult film industry with about 70 percent of its performers. While producers often find themselves turning away would-be porno starlets, reliable male talent is apparently hard to find. On a recent afternoon, a male actor named “Paul Starr” dropped by to try and help rectify that shortage. The clean-cut, 35-year-old University of Wisconsin graduate says he has done two sex scenes so far, earning $400 each time for about two hours of work. “I won’t be able to run for Senate,” admits Starr. But the bread-and-butter issues appear to overwhelm any future political aspirations. “I get to do this and get paid for it? What a country,” Starr says.